If you’re looking for love, then listen up– Jaimy Blazynski, the Date Doctor is here!
Sometimes, dating can be a grey area, so this week Jaimy is taking a look at how you can figure out if your current situation is the “real thing,” or just a fling. Keep in mind, there’s nothing wrong with a light fling, as long as no one expects more from it.
1. He Isolates You
If your guy never wants you to meet his family or friends, that’s a sign of a fling– when he keeps you secret, someone nobody knows about, it means he’s not really sharing his life with you.
2. Clothing Optional
It also might be a fling if you spend the majority of your time together with your clothing off. If most of your phone calls are “hey I’m coming over” at 11 at night, and you end up with your clothes off and not going out in public… it’s a fling.
3. The Post-Sex Situation
After you have sex with this person, if they get up and get dressed or leave. If you’re at their house, you might not be a welcome guest if it’s a fling. It can be tough if you want to cuddle and he wants to get on with the day, but if you’re willing to be aware of the reality of your situation it should be fine. Flings rarely develop into actual relationships, and that’s something you need to look at realistically and honestly.
4. Making Excuses
If you are coming up with excuses for why he’s not always available, when he doesn’t even offer them… it is a fling. Don’t try to rationalize why he’s gone for periods of time, because if it’s just a fling then there is no reason to do so.
5. Not Planning the Next Date
If he never plans the next date at the end of the date, and just leaves, once again– it’s a fling. And that’s okay, but be sure you’re not simply waiting for another call that may never happen. It’s a constant waiting mode and you never know for sure what’s going on. If you think it might be something more than a fling think about this– can I call this person if I have a flat tire and need help, or to vent to if I’m stressed out about something? If the answer is yes… there could be something more in the future of your relationship.