One of the most fascinating and fun aspects of this job is fielding the multitude of passionate responses. Whether it’s to something mentioned in the Straight Male Friend Podcast, a comment I’ve made on a panel discussion or to something in print like this post regarding myths about men, the feedback is rarely lukewarm — very little grey area in peoples’ opinions. I also find it interesting that often, the most vehement debates surrounding this subject matter are had with women. Meanwhile the guys sit on the other side of the room, silently nodding their heads in support, “You go SMF!”
Folks are quick to assume that the Straight Male Friend perspective is meant purely to titillate. That couldn’t be further from the truth. I’ve got two daughters so each and everything I say here, I’d say to them because, as a guy, I know the games dudes play – and I’ve played them all! And I desperately want them to be ready for the myriad challenges of love, sex, dating and relationships. So, yes, discussing these subjects is fun, but I do take the topics pretty seriously.
Now normally, I’m in the position of “answer man”, but I love to have conversations, open communication between men and women. Hopefully ladies gain some new insight on guys, and guys can learn a new thing or two about ladies. So, I’d like to turn the tables. As a guy, I’ve got some deep questions for the women, so here we go…
1. In virtually every romantic comedy, there’s some dorky guy who’s chasing the woman of his dreams, popping up unexpectedly at her apartment, following her around, making up excuses to come to her workplace, maybe singing some song outside her window at two o’clock in the morning, busting into her wedding at the last minute to proclaim his love, why is this romantic? Isn’t that behavior usually grounds for a restraining order?
2. Is “courting” still important? If so, then why? Is it a two-way street? Do women court men? Do people still say “courting?”
3. Which would you least prefer in a partner – a guy who made significantly less than you or a guy significantly shorter than you?
4. Why do you always want to have the, “honey we need to talk” conversation when the game is on or when it’s time to go to sleep?
5. Why do you always say you want a nice guy with a sense of humor, but only go out with the a-hole with the bad temper? Additionally, as much as women say they love a guy with a sense of humor, guys love it times two! A funny lady? Hot! And even better than a funny woman is a lady who can laugh! Double HOT! Laugh at our crappy jokes? Triple HOT!
6. When you ask a guy, “What are you thinking about?” and he responds, “Nothing.” Believe him. Seriously. We are absolutely capable of thinking about nothing. We try to think about nothing at least 5 times a day….but it always turns into some day dream about Halle Berry, peanut butter, and a bag of Chee-tos. Ok, maybe that’s just me.
7. Why are you so incapable of being objective about a person’s physical appearance even if you find that person’s personality objectionable? Don’t get me wrong, I know that attractiveness is very subjective. But if one more lady tells me Kim Kardashian isn’t “all that pretty” because she “has no talent” or because “she made a sex tape” or “she wears so much make-up” I just might lose it. All the make-up in the world won’t make me or anyone else hot if they don’t already have the raw goods. And by the way, I saw the sex tape….the lady’s got some talent.
8. And finally…why haven’t I heard from you? Send you questions, comments, feedback, topic suggestions to firstname.lastname@example.org
Your Straight Male Friends, Marcus Osborne, John Scott & Matt Staudt are offering up the advice & insight on love, sex, dating & relationships that women REALLY need! Your Straight Male Friend – Every woman should have one!”
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